I was reading my friend Melissa's blog and noticed that she had some posts labeled "speed blogging" and I decided that sounded like a good plan for me, since I always try to wait for a good time or great idea to blog about and neither ever seem to come. So here goes . . .
Most of the time I don't feel much older than when I was in college and it really doesn't seem like it was that long ago at all. Then the other day I was at a mom's breakfast, thoroughly enjoying our conversation, when the thought struck me that we were all so "grown up". I mean really adults, not just young people on the verge of being adults like we were in college. And its funny because the most of the things that make me feel so grown up are things I would never have dreamed of when I was younger. For instance, I knew that when I got my first apartment or first real job, that would be a sign I was grown up. I also knew getting married and having kids would be proof I was grown up. But, the things that make me feel the most like I'm not a kid anymore weren't on that list because most of them I couldn't have predicted. Things like making decisions about my children's education or trying to sell a house or rent a house. Then, there are those things that I would have recognized as signs of adulthood, but never thought of: the unexpected death of a parent before I was thirty or helping with the care of my elderly father-in-law before he passed away. There are also the more subtle ways I've grown up. I'm not as judgemental as I used to be (although I didn't know it then) and I'm also much more able to admit my own mistakes. I actually find it freeing now to try and be honest with myself about those areas that I'm good at and those that I wish I was good at, but really am not (i.e. writing thank you notes, keeping up on pictures/albums for the kids, consistently reading my Bible & praying - some of these were a lot easier when I was younger, why is that?)
So, what is it that makes you feel like an adult? And is it different from what you thought it would be like when you were younger? Do you ever look back on your young adult years and think, "I really was just a kid then" ?
Monday, July 2, 2007
You know you're a grown up when. . .
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4 comments:
The one thing that really makes me feel like an adult now, and not something that I would have thought of as a child as a grown up thing, is having to make so many medical decisions for myself. I never thought that I would be making them at such a young age.
Getting our first mortgage a few months ago for some reason really seemed like the final milestone of adulthood for me. Growing up, I always thought there would be some magical transformation at 21 - there wasn't and honestly, I was a little disappointed by that.
Also, along with what Kel said, medical stuff. Not even necessarily for myself, but going through the summer a few years ago with all of Tom's heart problems. Sitting in an ER waiting room at 2 am, not knowing what would happen you definitely grow up a little more.
Doing a variation on a theme, I would say that what makes me feel like an adult is dealing with health issues. I think the thing about being a child is that generally you take the well being of your body for granted, because in many ways you can. As an adult, however, if I abuse my body in the least I pay for it. If I drink too much coffee, I spend too much time on the pot, if I have certain wheat based products, or greasy foods, I go back to the pot. In general I deal with digestive issues. Along with this, my hair is a little thinner, my gums have receded, I sometimes make noises (grunts, groans) when I get up from a chair. Also, my metabolism has slowed down, but unfortunately my appetite hasn't. As a result of all this, I take probiotics, am intentional about getting fiber (now that's an adult word) am intentional about eating more fruits and vegetables, and if I go to fast food, I don't supersize. Actually, dealing with this stuff makes me feel old, in contrast to being an adult.
I feel more like an adult when I relate as an equal to others who clearly are adults: lenders, bankers, lawyers, etc. Of course when I do this I feel like I am playing a role, like I am a kid who is playing grown up.
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